THE STRESS MYTH
“Infertility is caused by stress."
Try to relax. If I had a nickel for every time I heard that phrase- I would not have to worry about how to pay for IVF if we need it. Because I would have a fortune. From family to friends to people I really do not even know. That seems to be the favorite phrase of everybody. They all tell me to take a vacation or a cruise or get drunk and have sex.
My question is, how do you relax, when you can't have what your heart desires? Believe me I wish I could relax! To all those people who say to, take a vacation. Yea right! Let me plan my vacation around the time when I going be ovulating. Like I know that months in advance. Because newsflash people, you have to be ovulating in order to get pregnant.
Infertility is seldom the result of psychological factors. In 90 percent of all infertility cases, infertility specialists are able to determine a physical problem. According to Resolve, the national infertility support organization, “Psychological stress is more likely a result of infertility than the cause.”
So to those who feel that they need to say something or give advice about my infertility, here is my suggestion, JUST SAY NOTHING! Or say something, like " I understand this is very frustrating for you to go through, if you want to talk please know I am here for you" I know that infertility is one of those topics that people do not know what to say and they feel the need to put their two cents in. I was told by someone to take my temperature that they would help. Now, I appreciate the tip, but after all this time and hiring a fertility specialist don't you think I would have already tried that!? I do not expect everyone to know everything about fertility treatments but please do not try to help, just offer your support and move on. It will be better for all involved.
To those who are struggling with infertility, there is something to be said about trying to relax, but just for your own piece of mind. You have to try and have some sort of life, infertility will take over your life, so do not let it. Get a pedicure or a massage, go shopping, or take a walk in the park. Spend time with your partner, take a vacation, but take a vacation to clear your mind and have some fun, not just to have drunken sex. Now if a baby comes 9 months later great, but take care of yourself first.
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