Crazy random thoughts from the mind of Shannon!

Since I was been totally MIA for way too long and this poor blog has been neglected I am going to just give you guys an update of what's been going in our crazy lives and some random thoughts from me.

-Claire is doing great, she contines to wow us everyday. Her vocabulary has increased by leaps and bounds and she pretty much repeats everything we say, which is scary- we really have to watch what we say now!

-I am going out of my mind getting ready for Claire's 2nd birthday party, as many of you know I'm the insane party planner who worries about things like straws, food labels, and personalized favor tags for parties. The party is in about a month so I need to get my butt in gear! photos to come after the party- but I'll give you a hint the colors are red and black polka dot- any ideas what her party theme is?

-I have a serious obsession with smocked dresses and monogrammed clothing for Claire- it's very scary. John just shakes his head as he sees package after package arrive at our house, he just doesn't understand how cute girl clothes are and I just can't say no.

-We are getting ready for our annual family photo shoot for our Holiday card, and this is a total stresser in my life- I have our coordinating outfits all ready, now I just have to pick the perfect card- do you have any idea how hard that is??

-I am LOVING the new show Revenge- it's my new guilty pleasure, if you don't tune in Wednesday nights, you must start- it's the best new show of the fall.


I will do my best to keep the blog updated in the coming months, I am working on giving it a face lift- it's time to move on to new bigger and better things, so stayed tuned!

Happy Fall y'all!!
-

Just Breathe. . .

When we are 10 years old and playing house with our friends we fantasize what our lives will be like when we grow up. We say we will marry Prince Charming and live in a big white house with blue shutters, a red door, and a tire swing in the front yard. No one stops to tell you that that is not reality.

We grow up a little more and realize around the age of 21 that Prince Charming does not exist and that just maybe we won't have 2.5 children and a white picket fence. We realize that money does not grow on trees and that at some point you have to pull yourself together and go to work.

At some point you get married and after about 2 years the honeymoon phase ends, and then the realty of mortgages, jobs, and responsibility sets in. Then in the blink of an eye you have a baby, and you get hit by a ton of bricks. Whoever thought you could be SO tired? How can a 8 pound meatloaf push you over the edge? Well at 4am when you haven't slept in 3 days you find out just how close to that edge you can get. You realize that sex is the last thing on your mind, the bed is for sleeping now, and sleeping only! You now do not own anything that is not covered in spit up or vomit, and your memory- well forget that, oh wait you already did, and where the hell are my damn keys!!??

If you have not experienced any of these blessed events, just hold on because one day you will and you realize that everything I have just said is oh so true. Now I sit here as a 30 year old working mom and wife. There is nothing I would change about my life, and I do not regret any of the decisions I have made, for those decisions have made me the person I am today, but damn life is hard work!

I feel like I have 10 balls in the air at all times, and I do just about everything I can to keep them all up in the air. My mind, or what is left of it, is constantly thinking of what I have to do 2 weeks in advance, because I need to coordinate it. There is no more going out at the last minute, you need to schedule a baby sitter, there is no time for anything to go wrong- everything must run like a well oiled machine.

There is ALWAYS laundry to be done, meals to be planned, dry cleaning to be picked up or dropped off, groceries to be bought, phone calls to be returned, a house to be cleaned, dinners to be cooked, dishwashers to be loaded/unloaded, a dog to be walked- and the list goes on and on and this is just the daily household things. That is not including what I do during the 8 hours that I am at work.

Then add on taking care of a 18 month old and trying to maintain a healthy relationship with my husband there are days where this mountain seems almost to big to even try to climb. Somehow I manage to chip away piece by piece, but I never feel like I get enough done- there are always things that get left undone, and I feel like a failure pretty much on a daily basis. Now this is partially my fault, as I am perfectionist so I like things done my way and a certain way, but most days I feel like I am failing as a mother and as a wife.

My husband tells me that I need a hobby, and I think when do I have time for a hobby? I wish I had time- I wish I knew what I would like to do, because in this time of my life I almost feel robotic. I try to be proactive in certain situations as to avoid an issue down the road and sometimes it just blows up in my face, because I cannot accept that not everyone is like me. I try to plan things out months in advance and then I spend months obsessing, which is using energy that I really don't have to spare.

I feel like I need to just take a step back and breathe, I need to live in the moment and realize that if something doesn't get done the world will not end, I feel like I am missing my daughters most precious time, because I am more concerned that she stay on her schedule.

This is not meant as a bitch session, but mearly away for me to hopefully go back and read this and change things in my life as to make it better and better for those around me.

16 months

I can sum up this age in 3 words: SHE NEVER STOPS! This is has to be the most exhausting age. Every minute on every day Claire is moving, running, jumping or climbing, you name it she's doing it and it's all day long. By the time she goes to bed I am collapsed in a heap on the couch. We are going to start her in gymnastics class next month, it's a mommy and me class (now that should be interesting!) that is once a week for 45 minutes- they get to jump on trampolines and play in the foam pit- should be fun for her- this will be her first group activity, other then daycare.

More big news, our finalization hearing is NEXT TUESDAY, in less then a week she will be our forever daughter, we are thrilled and next Tuesday cannot come fast enough. So I will update with photos from court when that is complete.

In closing here are some basic facts about our little monkey!

Size 4 diaper
Wearing size 12-18 month clothes
Loves to dance, especially to the Batman theme song- thank you daddy!
Loves Elmo
Just discovered her ride on toys- she has been afraid of them since Christmas
Wearing a size 3 shoe
Loves her sippy cup and milk
Can eat with a fork and spoon, she actually prefers it this way!

Bill and Guiliana IVF take 2!!

The Rancic's were on tonight and the episode starts with them starting their shots for their second IVF. I have to say that having been through the IVF process twice myself I think Guiliana is a BIG baby. I love her, don't get me wrong, but come on- those needles are TINY!! I did all my shots myself and never once did I cry. She was freaking out over the teeny tiny little needles. My husband just looked at me and said "you never complained once during IVF." WOW- it only took him a year and a half later to realize this.

As Guiliana was breaking down on the table before her egg retrieval all the emotions came flooding back- I remember that like it was yesterday. You are so full of hope, and it's such a roller coaster.

Guiliana also hosted her best friend and managers baby shower in this episode, I have to admit I teared up during that- she really put on a brave face and planned the baby shower, that was something I could never have done. Baby showers were evil for me- I avoided them like the plague when we were trying to get pregnant. So good for you G, that is so tough!!

Bill and Guiliana moving forwards!

Every week my husband and I tune into Bill and Guiliana on The Style Network, and this week as usual did not disappoint. I have said it so many times, but I just LOVE them! They are so cute together and are just a great couple.

I have to say kudos to Bill for that ring he got Guiliana, it was amazing! I told John I expect that at our next anniversary!

In this episode Guiliana and Bill have decided to move forward and do a second round of IVF, and she also had to break to news of her miscarriage to the public. As I was watching this episode I was holding my perfect 11 month old daughter in my arms, and I could not help but tear up.

IVF and infertility is so hard to go through in private, I cannot imagine going through it in the public eye- my heart just goes out to them as we have been there done that. Guiliana was telling Bill how going through this has made them a closer couple and that God has a plan and this is all happening for a reason.

I told myself that for years, but I remember sitting in my bed praying that I would get pregnant and for God to bless us with a child, then I would cry and cry and ask God, why was this happening to us, what had we done that was so bad that we deserved all this heartache? Now looking back it all makes sense. Nothing was meant to work, because we had to wait for our little angel to be born and to come into our lives. Even writing this I am fighting back the tears, because now I know she was meant to be ours, we just had to wait for her, and it was all worth it- every tear, every heart break, every minute was worth it.

We are ready to party!!

With monkey's first birthday party just around the corner, 10 days, but who's counting?! I am in full psycho stressed out mode! I am also dealing with getting everything ready for the holidays, and we have a jam packed schedule the next few weeks. I managed to get everything done and ordered- so now I have a few odds and ends to tie up for the party- but other then that we are ready to rock and roll.

I know we went overboard with this party- but honestly I don't care- we have waited so long to be able to celebrate our child's birthday and we are doing it in a big way. There were so many days that I thought I would never get to experience any of this- so I am treasuring each and every minute of it.

As if having a first birthday party, the holidays and preparing for my parents arrival to Vegas was not enough for this month- add in two court dates for our adoption, like we don't have enough going on. But these are BIG court dates- it's our TPR (termination of parental rights) hearing. That's right folks- we are very confident as is our case worker, that all parental ties to monkey's birth parents will be severed in less then 2 weeks, and then she is unofficially ours- we still have to finalize her adoption. So keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we are hoping to have even more to celebrate this Christmas.

A Bill and Guiliana Rancic Update

Bill and Guiliana Rancic opened up to the ladies of The View about their recent IVF. Now I have been impatiently waiting for their pregnancy announcement. Sadly, their first IVF ended in miscarriage. It is discussed in this weeks People Magazine, but you can see their heart breaking interview below. This breaks my heart, I know what they are going through and how hard of a journey infertility is. I just love them, I know they will be great parents when the time is right.

I am a bad blogger!

I know I am a very bad blogger- when you have an active 7 month old time to be on the computer is just few and far between. Let's see there have been some new developments in our little monkey's case. Our caseworker filed the termination of parental rights paperwork with the DA's office. This is a HUGE step!! We are super excited!! We hope to be assigned to an adoption worked by the end of the year- which would make finalization in early 2011. Our little monkey has always been ours from day one, but it will be nice to make it official.

I know it's cliche, but she is such a joy in my life. Everything is about her, and everything is because of her. Nothing else matters if she's happy. Everything else is just not as important as her. I went to a networking event the other night and I took her with me- she was happily nomming her Sophie toy in her stroller not bothering a soul- yet I got some very evil looks when I come wheeling in with my baby in the stroller. I could have cared less- if they didn't accept her they didn't accept me. Luckily she turned on the charm and everyone was commenting on how cute she was before we left.

My life is so different, I don't sleep in, I don't go out to clubs and we almost never go to the movies, but instead I get to raise this beautiful little soul, and she is such a sweet little soul- that child does not have a mean bone in her body, she just pure love. I get up at 5am when she's hungry and I love it- I'm falling asleep by 9pm, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.

I thank God everyday for bringing her into our lives- she was well worth the wait!!

Should you potty train your infant?

Until today I had never heard of infant potty training the technical term is "elimination communication" or "natural infant hygiene." Infant potty training is the practice of introducing your baby to the toilet or potty at a very early age —usually between birth and 4 months.

Now, I have to admit this is the most insane thing to me, I cannot imagine trying to potty train my month old, good lord- she is only 5 months old. She is learning new things every day, do we really have to throw the potty into that mix?

Parents who do this usually do this to avoid diapers completely by racing their baby to the nearest bathroom whenever they anticipate a poop or pee. Others use diapers on and off. By 18 months, in most cases, their children have "graduated" — that is, they know when they have to use the toilet and get themselves there successfully.

Just a fun fact- the average baby boy in the United States gives up diapers at 39 months and the average girl at 36 months, according to a 2001 study by the Medical College of Wisconsin. (It typically takes eight to ten months for a child to go from complete reliance on diapers to being fully potty trained, the study found.)

While the notion of potty training a very young infant seems radical to many American parents, it's not a new idea. Before 1950, most children in the United States were toilet trained by 18 months. And today, most African, Asian, and European babies are trained well before their second birthday. The change in views is most likely from the invention of disposable diapers.

People claim that infant potty training strengthens the bond between parent and child because as a parent you are learning your child's cues and learning to be in tune with your child's needs. People claim that learning their bathroom cues is just as easy as learning their cues for being sleepy or hungry.

Now for everyone out there that is wondering how you can get started here are some basic ideas:

• Watch your baby and get to know their elimination patterns. When and how often does your baby go to the bathroom? Does he always go at a particular time of day — right after waking up, for example? Does he make any particular noises, gestures, or expressions when he has to go?

• When your baby makes one of his typical elimination signs, hold him gently over a toilet, a potty, or even a bucket or pot, which may better suit his tiny size.

• While he's relieving himself, make a noise that your baby will learn to associate with elimination (many parents use ssssss or some other water like sound; others use a word or phrase like "go potty").

• Repeat this sound or phrase whenever you see that your baby has to go, and also while he's going, so he'll learn to recognize it as a signal and connect his own impulses with the act of using the potty.

• When an accident happens, be matter-of-fact about it and stay relaxed. Advocate and mother of five Parise says your attitude helps your child stay relaxed about the process, too.

• During the nighttime, keep a potty right by the bed and put your baby on it before nursing or if he's restless during the night. Some advocates say that babies rarely pee or poop during a deep sleep and will usually become restless or give some sort of sign sufficient to wake a parent when they need to go — assuming that you're co-sleeping. (Other advocates say that using diapers at night is fine. Even self-proclaimed infant potty training "evangelist" Lynch admits, "In our house, sleep trumps pee.") If you opt to put your baby down sans diaper, place him on a waterproof mattress pad in case of an accident.

So I have thrown the idea out there- do what you want with it, I have to admit that I would never do this- I feel there is a reason that diapers were invented and I have much better things to do with my time then hold my child over a toilet ten times a day. I would much rather be cuddling with my baby or taking a walk with them then be hanging out in the bathroom with my child.

Congrats to Celine Dion!

After what seems like forever Celine Dion is finally getting her happy ending, it was just announced that she is 14 weeks pregnant with twins, concieved through her sixth IVF attempt. She had embryos that were frozen from several years ago. This is great news, and although she is in her 40's her embryos are in the 30's since they were frozen years ago.

This brings up a endless debate of "how old is too old to have children"? Now many would argue that women over the age of 40 should not be allowed to undergo fertility treatments, because this is just too old to have children. There is many arguments that vary from the medical risks for a 40 something year old woman to have a child are just not worth it, and then there is the fact that can a 40 something woman have the engery to keep us with her growing child.

Dr Sher of the Sher Institute discusses the medical risks involved with having a child: "Yes there are age-related medical risks and it is indisputable that pregnancy in older women is associated with increased risk to both mother and baby. Pregnancy-induced complications (e.g. preeclampsia, gestational diabetes intrauterine growth retardation, premature separation of the placenta, preterm delivery, low birth weight, dysfunctional labor and cesarean section ) are all far more likely to occur in older women. However, this risk can be lessened by in advance identifying those older women who are most predisposed to developing such complications."

In terms of women not being able to keep up with the growing childen, we as humans are living longer these days, many women are living well into their eighties. Yes, there may be some compromises involved with the physical activitis that children take part in, there are other benefits to being an older parent, more life experiences, knowledge, and wisdom- everything is a trade off.

I strongly disagree that a physican should be able to deny a patient fertility treatments because of age, this is down right discrimination. However it is the duty of that physican to advise of the potential risks so the patient can make an educated informed decision.

As someone who dealt with infertility until you have walked in these infertile shoes you can have no opnion. You do not know what it feels like to not be able to have children. For some being pregnant and experiencing child birth is very important, and for those people they will go to the end of the earth to have that experience, even it means countless IVF's. Hat's off to Celine and her family, prayers for healthy pregnancy and happy babies in the fall!

We are eating solids- well kinda!!

Out little monkey is growing by leaps and bounds and about a month ago we got the go head from our doctor to start solid foods, well baby food that is. She loves it! Well, our first try failed, she hated the rice cereal, and I have to admit I can't blame her- I wouldn't want to eat that either. One thing to remember is always give rice cereal with a spoon, never put it in a bottle, unless you are directed by your doctor- it can cause a choking hazard.

We have since moved onto apples, banana's, oatmeal, carrots, and squash- and she is loving all of them. Her favorite is the mix of banana's and strawberries. She has even starting trying to hold her own spoon- wow they grow up so fast!!

The rule that I have been following is introducing a new food every three days, that way you give time to see if there is going to be an allergic reaction. She is still getting her bottles every 3-4 hours, because her main source of nutriation should still be coming from formula, not baby food.

I am also considering making my own baby food, but I have not jumped on that band wagon yet, maybe soon- stay tuned!

Do infertiles make better parents?

This is something that could possibly cause some drama in mommy world, but I do believe that people that have suffered through infertility and struggled to have children make better parents, because they want it more then other parents. I think that something happens to you when you really want something and you can't have it.

Research shows that families created with the help of fertility treatment compare favorably with families that conceived without treatment, especially after the first 12 months. There is some research that infertility patients are more anxious during pregnancy and their child’s first year of life, but the anxiety usually passes after that. Parents that conceive through IVF tend to be more protective of their children; more child focused; and show greater warmth towards their children. These studies have been small, but this supports what I see in real life.

Parents who chose to adopt rather than stay in infertility treatment also make great parents. Studies show that adoptive parents invest more time and financial resources in their children than biological parents and “evidence a high level of strength in terms of warmth, communication, discipline, and cohesion.” Researchers speculate that “One of the reasons adoptive parents invest more is that they really want children, and they go to extraordinary means to have them.” Amen to that.

I have to admit that I worry about the effect of over protectiveness on kids, but I think our entire generation of parents is over protective, not just parents that conceived or adopted after years of trying. I don’t think we have a good grasp on how to weigh relative risks. We are overly worried about low chance risks such as stranger abduction; as a result we micromanage our kids’ lives because we are afraid to let them out of our sight. The older my kids get the more I believe that children need to learn certain lessons from failure and falling and figuring things out on their own. But that is the subject of a different blog.

Parents that have had to struggle to become parents sometimes have a hard time giving themselves permission to have the normal feelings of frustration that comes along with parenting. They may feel let down after all the years of anticipation. They may think they don’t have the right to complain about being tired, or wishing for a day to themselves, or craving time to wash their hair and shave their legs. But fortunately, these feeling also usually pass with time. Most parents of two year olds and teens feel pretty darn entitled to their frustration, regardless how they got their kids.

Infertility can affect the quality of parenting in two ways. Infertility treatment results in a disproportionately large number of multiple births, and much research supports that parenting twins and triplets is much more stressful on parents. Also, subsequent attempts at infertility treatment for a second child can add significant stress on parents. Of course we are all familiar with the John and Kate plus 8 situation- they wanted just "one more" and ended up with 6- talk about stress to a family!!

I seem to be drawn to people who have struggled to create their families, and I have no doubt that their kids are the most loved in the world. I know my child is certainly one of the most loved kids in the world, mostly because of the trail of tears, prayers, and struggles that it took to get her.

God only gives you what you can handle.

Tonight I watched a show on TLC titled "Quintuplet Surprise" and it was about Casey and Ethan Jones from Austin, TX that had 5 babies in January of 2009.

The story was great, they had gone through IUI using donor sperm, because the husband had very low sperm counts. This family had it all, a beautiful little 4 year old girl, an absolutely beautiful home, tropical vacations every year, and great careers. Then they had quints- and their lives changed forever. The husband kept saying that everyone tells them that their children were such a blessing, to which he said "who prayers to have 5 babies at one time?" Yes the quints are a blessing, but their life would never be the same.

The husband was a home builder and when the economy tanked so did his business- they had to sell their big beautiful home and move into a smaller home and money was a constant worry, so was keeping all 5 kids in diapers. They figured if all 5 could be potty trained by age 2 it would save them over $20,000 a year just in diapers!!

I began to think about my own life while watching this show- I used to pray for twins, or even triplets- you have to consider these options when going through fertility treatments. I just wanted to get pregnant, I didn't care with how many.

Now that I watch this show I really have a new appreciation for that saying "God does not give you more then you can handle" There would have been no way I could have handled more then one baby at a time, mentally or financially (especially with the economy taking a crap).

Our little monkey is just an angel- she is a good sleeper and a good eater- and I just have to stop and think this is what I was meant to deal with. I really believe that this was God's plan for me all along- because he knew what I could handle. John and I have such a schedule with monkey- our lives are not any different, expect that we take her with us, and we are doing just great.

My life is so rich and full right now, and it's all happening when it was meant to happen, I truly believe for the first time in my life that I am where I am meant to be and with the people I am meant to be with.

Did the Rancic's IVF work?!

If you watched The View last week you heard that Guiliana and Bill Rancic were doing IVF, now on the show they said they were starting IVF "next week" well as we know in show business nothing is as it seems. That View episode was taped, so little did we know that Guiliana has been in Chicago going through IVF, and not in LA, has anyone noticed her missing from E lately?!

I heard through the grapevine, or otherwise known as The Nest that the Rancic's IVF was successful and Guiliana is pregnant. I heard this from a nestie who had dinner with family friends of the Rancic's. Now, is this true or just a rumor, we will have to wait and find out!

The View Talks Infertility With Bill and Guiliana Rancic

This past week The View did a special show all about infertility, and much to my surprise I thought it was great. The ladies started by talking about their own expediences, Sherri Shepard went through IVF to have her son, and Barbara Walters had 3 miscarriages before adopting her daughter, and of course Elisabeth stated that she couldn't get pregnant until she gave up Gluten, due to undiagnosed Celiac Disease- she now has three kids- I do not think she was infertile, EVER, but that is another discussion.

Then they brought out a fertility specialist, who gave the basic facts on when to seek help from a specialist, honestly that part was kind of boring, but then came out Bill and Guiliana Rancic, who I LOVE, and they talked about their inability to conceive, and that they are getting ready to start IVF next week. I really love their honesty about their journey. Guiliana got a lot of crap from Whoopi for not wanting to gain five pounds. Now I understand that five pounds is not a big deal, but for someone, like Guiliana, who works in the public eye and has to fit into sample size clothing, it's hard. But I do see their point, if you want kids- you do whatever it takes to have them!

Then came the statement that most people were very upset about, at least on the infertility boards that I frequent. Guiliana was talking about how celebs do not talk about doing IVF or using donor eggs, because of the stigma that goes a long with it, then Joy Behar says "because when you use donor eggs, they are not your kids" and Bill agreed with her. Now, people it does not take a rocket scientist to know that using donor eggs will equal the child not being biologically yours, so yes Joy and Bill are correct, but believe me that baby is yours. My daughter did not come from my DNA, but she is mine in every sense of the word. So I really do not understand what the big deal is about Bill saying what we all know is true!

They closed out the show with having several different couples talk about their journey to have children. The first two couples were still in the process, the one couple was this cute young couple that were dealing with male infertility, and had done several unsuccessful IVF's, they were really nice- my heart went out to them. The other lady was a divorced woman who was 47 who was still trying to have a baby, now I gotta say- lady you are pushing 50- adopt already, IVF just is not going to work- you are too old. I know that is harsh, but come on 47? That is just crazy!!! Adopt and have your family and move on with your life- she had been trying to have a baby for 7 years!!

The last couple was a couple who had an baby boy from IVF and he was just so stinking cute! Watching this show brought back a lot of feelings for me, I never want to be at that place in my life again. But I am so happy to see that infertility is getting the attention it deserves so people can make educated decisions about their fertility.

Adventures in Parenting

It's been a crazy 4 weeks with monkey in the house- but it's been wonderful!
We sleep in four hour increments and fall asleep before 9pm every night, but we enjoy every minute of it. Monkey is doing great, and I will report back on Friday with her stats from her pediatrician appointment.

We take her everywhere with us, everything from dinner to the grocery store. She loves her swing and she LOVES her boppy pillow, she especially likes to lay on her boppy and watch the ceiling fan. She also loves her tummy time on her boppy- I think she will be a tummy sleeper as soon as she can roll, which will make mommy very nervous!!

She loves her baths, as long as you keep her warm, which I successfully do by keeping a warm wash cloth on her tummy while in the tub. She also needs to have warm towel and warm jammies after her bath- pretty much put them in the dryer while she is in the bath, and have daddy bring them in after the bath. She also has to have the water running during the bath to relax her, and use warm lotion after the bath. Yes, I know she is a princess already!!

So that is an update on our little monkey- I will keep everyone updated, tomorrow is her 2 month birthday- wow, she is growing so fast!!

We got our first call!!!

OMG!!! John and I were sitting at the kitchen table working on some things tonight at 9:15pm when our home phone rings, and the caller id says "Clark County" so John goes, who would be calling us from Clark County. I screamed "honey! they are calling about a placement, answer the phone" so what does he do? Hands me the phone!! Men!! So I answer the phone, it was a new placement call- it was for a 2 year old healthy little Hawaiian boy, no parents, they are looking for his realitves.

We had to say no, because we are not quite prepared for a two year old, we have not gotten our convertible car seat yet, so we have no way to bring him home. I am now getting on that and ordering one.

John and I serioulsy feel like we are going to have a heart attack, we are so excited that we actually got a call and we are in the system and that our lives could change in a blink of an eye.
Stay tuned for our adventures in parenthood!

What are the hot baby names for 2010?

The tireless search for the perfect baby name isn’t always easy on any new parents -- even after scouring the web for advice, playing with naming tools, and sifting through mountains of baby-name books at the bookstore.If you’re still on a quest to name baby something cool and trendy, you might want to reconsider your strategy: Instead of hopping on the trend train this year, it’s looking like more and more parents-to-be will be opting for unique classics they love. With 2009 name fads, from Marley to Miley, safely behind us, what do we see as the hottest trends in baby names for the year ahead. Well the good news to report is that names are taking a turn for the good!

For Girls the trends are turning to romantic timless names like, Sophia, Lily, Isabella, Ava, Claire, and Olivia Why you ask? These days, parents-to-be are loving distinctly feminine-sounding monikers for girls and kicking the crossover trend (of names like Riley and Dylan) to the curb -- at least for now. And don’t expect to find any Tiffanys in this bunch -- 2010 babes will be sporting classic and simple names, not diminutive and frilly ones.

Also shooting to the top of the lists is Grace, Charlotte, and Abigail. Older relatives’ names match perfectly with the current trend, so parents naming their baby Hannah or Claire get the double bonus of honoring a loved one. (While it’s tough for us to imagine a baby Judy, Donna, or Brenda today, check back with us in 2020.)

Names to look out for: Vivienne, Stella, and Amelia. Angelina Jolie’s Vivienne is just a year-and-a-half old, and the name is already climbing the charts. Same goes for Stella, recently used by Ellen Pompeo and Tori Spelling. And Amelia? It’s just plain adorable.

What's out for girls is crossover names, that's right people gender neutral names are out like last years Manolo's. While you’ll no doubt still see some newborn Baileys and Rileys in the nursery, in general, these names are losing steam. The one exception is Addison, because it's just so stinking cute!!

Now, what's looking up for boys, biblical and celtic names. Just like with girls, parents of boys are moving away from modern, sometimes made-up names and opting for traditional, often family-inspired names for their little prince.

Look out for Ethan, Jacob, Lucas, Liam, Logan, Gavin, and Aidan. Aidan has been a clear favorite for the past few years and looks to continue its reign in 2010, much to my dismay! Serioulsy people Carrie dumped Aidan so long ago! Big is so much better- John James Preston what a classic powerful name!!

What's our for boys? Well that would be anything that rhymes with Aidan, except Aidan itself. The super-hot name (thanks to Sex and the City) sparked a rush of spin-offs (thanks to Britney Spears) from Jayden to Caeden to Greydon and far, far beyond. Sure, some of the less out-there variations will probably still pop up, but as a whole, this trend (and the entire made-up name category) is on the outs.

Twilight, the hottest thing since Harry Potter, has surprisingly sparked an even bigger following when it comes to baby names. Hot names pulled from the book include Edward, Bella, Emmet, Jacob, Jasper, Esme, Alice, Rosalie, and Carlisle. Even Cullen -- the last name of its dreamy hero, Edward -- is also expected be a hit, which is my personal favorite!! But while the Twilight craze itself has certainly given major play in the popularity of these names, they just so happen to also fit in perfectly with this year’s trend of going back to the classics.

No matter what name you pick, remember you are the parent it's your decision- do not let family and friends influence your decision. I will tell you that my favorite names are listed in the blog entry, but I will not reveal them, I'm secretavie like that!
Happy Naming!!

Just adopt and you will get pregnant!

That is the new saying I hear all the time, "now that you are adopting you will get pregnant" This is now the most annoying comment you can say to someone. Yeah right, signing those adoption papers will magically fix my husbands sperm and make everything work right! We had two failed IVF's- hello people. We couldn't get pregnant in a lab, what makes you think we can get pregnant naturally!?

Yes, there are a lot of women who adopt and then get pregnant- I am sure it helps to take the stress off, because stress does effect trying to conceive.

But in actuality only 8% of all couples that are faced with infertility who go onto adopt get pregnant.

So please to your friends who are adopting just say, "we are so excited for you, you guys will be great parents" and leave it at that!

If at first you don't concieve, TRY TRY AGAIN!

That was the tagline for the new season of Bill and Guiliana, which premiered last night on the Style network. It was a great episode, these two are so cute and funny to watch- they really have a great relationship. The season opens with Guiliana taking a home pregnancy test, which turns out to be negative.

She was so disappointed- she said she felt she was really pregnant and this really makes her want to have a baby even more. I have been there, done that, have that T-shirt! While watching that scene all the memories of disappointment came flooding back to me. When you see that one line on that stick or the words "Not Pregnant" it is crushing! Gotta love the phantom symptoms, I swear I had morning sickness every month, and I would have put money on the fact that I was pregnant, but nope not that month!

Guilana makes a comment about how she never wanted kids, and how she spent tons of money preventing pregnancy and now it's all different. That was me, never wanted kids, always thought I was too selfish- and kids always hated me. I think about all the money I could have saved on birth control!!

I am really interested to see where this season goes- they obviously want a family and it's been a tougher road then they thought it would be to conceive. Everything thinks you decide to have a baby and bam next month you get pregnant. Well, okay some people have that happen, but not most!

I think we are going to see them go through the initial fertility testing- and then come to a crossroad- maybe everything is fine and they just need more time- or maybe they will find something. I love that they are being so open about this. Infertility is something that one out of ever six couples will struggle with and needs to get more media attention.