Saturday, January 31, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 31, 2009

"Vision without action is merley a dream. Action without vision just passes the time. Vision with action can change the world."- Joel A. Barker

This octuplet mother makes me sick!

Yesterday I had an appointment with my fertility specalist- and I couldn't help but bring up the octuplet story. My doctor said she is so mad about it, she said it gives fertility specalist's a bad name and gives people the wrong idea about fertility treatments. She is so right, I was discussing this very subject with some girls at my office and while they feel that she is crazy person to do what she did, the couldn't help but ask me if I could have eight kids with all the fertility drugs that I take.

People have such the wrong idea about fertility treatments, while yes there is a risk of multiple births, the chances are rather low. Fertility doctors will cancel a cycle in a heartbeat if you have too many mature eggs, or with an artificial insemination cycle they will request that you convert to an IVF cycle, so they can surgically take the eggs out and fertilize them. If there are lots of embroyo's the leftovers can be frozen for future use, but only 2 or 3 embroyo's would be put in the uterus for possible implanation, not EIGHT!

It has come out over the past few days that this crazy mother of eight did IVF, I really connot imagie that, what unetical doctor would put back eight embroyos, espically with her age of 33 and also knowing that she has 6 other kids at home.

This story makes me so sick, because I hold doctors in the highest standard, espically our fertility doctor- she is helping us to create life- what is a bigger deal then that? Because of her we can achieve our dream of parenthood, so if anyone tries to belittle her field it makes me sick. This woman is getting exactly what she wants, attention! We need to stop talking about her and giving her what she wants! Just let her be, and figure out how she is going to care for her 14 kids.

Friday, January 30, 2009

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 30, 2009

"Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is nightmare."- Japanese proverb

Is it really in what we are eating!?

Everytime that I am in the office of my fertility specalist's I look around and I think, how can all these women have issues getting pregnant? Getting pregnant is one of the most natural things in our lives and it seems like there are so many couples that are having problems getting pregnant. There are four major fertility clinics in my town and they all have at least a two week wait to get an appointment, how is in one town that the clinics are that busy?

I wonder is it something we are eating or drinking, it is all the cell phone and laptop use?

I came across an article that talks about the chemiclas that are widely used in food packaging, pesticides and clothing that may reduce a woman's fertility. It states that exposure to perfluorinated chemicals (PFCs) could influence how long it takes for a woman to get pregnant.

Researchers led by a team from the University of California in Los Angeles analysed data from 1,240 women in Denmark recruited between 1996 and 2002 who went on to give birth. They measured the level of two of the most common PFCs, perfluorooctanoic acid (PFOA) and perfluorooctane sulfonate (PFOS), in the women's blood. They then asked the women how long it had taken them to conceive.

The average age of the women was 31, and 15% of the group were over 35, which is the age at which fertility is known to decline. The researchers found that women who needed infertility treatment or took longer than 12 months to conceive had higher levels of PFOS and PFOA than those who conceived in under six months. They estimated that women with the highest exposure to PFOS were in fact 70% to 134% more likely to suffer infertility (defined as taking longer than 12 months or requiring infertility treatment) than women with the lowest exposure.

Meanwhile, those with the highest levels of PFOA were 60% to 154% more likely to be infertile than women with the lowest exposure.

The researchers said no conclusions could be drawn from the study on how the chemicals may affect women who could not get pregnant at all. But they said the effect of the chemicals on a man's sperm quality could impact on ability to conceive "since the couples may share similar aspects of lifestyle".

Here is a little background on PFOA. It is widely used in manufacturing and industry, including the production of non-stick cookware, heat-resistant materials and those used in waterproof clothing. PFOS has been used to treat surfaces and upholstery, some insecticides and fire extinguisher foam, although its use has been steadily falling since the late 1990s.

Tony Rutherford, chair of the British Fertility Society, said the results were interesting. "This research shows a tenuous link in the delay to conception in women with the highest levels of two commonly used perfluorinated chemicals," he added. "This is an important finding and certainly warrants further detailed research, particularly in those trying for a family. This study emphasises the importance of remaining vigilant to potential environmental factors that may impact on fertility."

I wish they had given some insight to how we can have less exposure to these chemicals. We use so many chemicals in order to make our life easier, but do we really know all the risks in making our lives easier? and is is worth jeopardizing your family over?

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 29, 2009

"Make no little plans. They have no magic to stir men's blood and probably themselves will not be realized. Make big plans. Aim high in hope and work. Remembering the noble, logical diagram once recorded will not die."- Daniel H Burnham

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 28, 2009

"The grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for."- Allan K. Chalmers

Oct- what?

A couple in Southern California will certianly have their hands full after the wife gave birth to octuplets- yes you read that right, 8 babies at one time.

The doctors actually thought there was only secen. but one was hiding- what a shock the doctor had when he felt another foot after delivering the seventh baby.

It has not yet been relased if the babies were concieved through the help of fertility drugs, if I had to put my money on it I would bet so, considering that the human body does not naturally release eight eggs.

This is the only the second set of surviving octuplets born in the United States, so these babies made history on Monday.

While it is exciting to welcome eight babies into the world, it does not come without risk. Having high order multiples is extremely risky for babies and for mother. This is why it is so important to make sure that you are closely monitored when taking fertility drugs, becasue they are very powerful! Seek out and consult with a reproductive endocrinologist before starting fertility treatments.

But in the mean time heres to eight healthy and happy babies and good luck mom and dad!

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Fertility news everywhere!

Once upon a time in a fairytail world, a woman's ovaries were her own private affair and baby making was private conversation, not the topic of girl's power lunches, blogs, websites, or TV dramas, such as Sex and the City, Brothers and Sisters, and Private Practice, or big budget movies such as Baby Mama. Desperate women struggling with fertility issues whispered to their doctors about their trials and tribulations and secretely took drugs to stimulate their follicles and crossed their fingers that they would become pregnant. Today, eggs,donor sperm, IVF, IUI, and fertility drugs are the topic of open conversation, and everyone is eager to hear about everyone elses's problems. Its the "Ill tell you what's what with me, if you tell me what's wrong with you". Even politicians are in the fertility limelight. Sarah Palin's baby, Trig, was born when she was 44. And the newly appointed New York senator, Kirsten Gillibrand, cast a vote in Congress the day before giving birth to son Henry at age 41 last May. So baby making is the new hot topic, babies and Bugaboo strollers are the newest accessory in Hollywood. Throw away that Hermes Birkin bag ladies, and get a baby!

And yet with all the news that is out in the world about infertility, many young women still don't fully understand the facts about age as a risk factor for infertility. Women are starting families much later in life, they are going to school longer, pursuing careers and thinking that they can wait to have children, and their Ob-Gyns don't always tell them that they need to be concerned with their age and how long they really have to concieve and carry a healty baby to term. With all the 40 something Hollywood mothers like Marcia Cross and Molly Ringwald (some of whom are presumably using donor eggs or IVF to get pregnant) and cases like Palin and Gillibrand reassure them that time is on their side so its okay to wait.

This week, the American Fertility Association (AFA) is launching "Manicures & Martinis" at the Dashing Diva Nail Salon in Manhattan. This is the first in a series of one-hour conversations about reproductive health that is geared towards women in thier 20's and 30's. Its meant for women who want children, but aren't ready just yet. It will feature a leading fertility expert, who will talk about the reality of the biological clock and other risk factors for infertility. There will also be martinis as well as a non alcohol "fertilitini."

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 27, 2009

"Every time you stand up for an ideal, you send forth a tiny ripple of hope."- Robert Kennedy

Monday, January 26, 2009

The Bachelor

To all of us who love reality tv, this post is for you. I am loving this season of The Bachelor- Jason is a single dad of Tyler, and all the women on the show are claiming they are ready to be instant parents. I have to laugh when listening to them. They don't have a clue what it takes to be a parent, they think that all they have to do is marry Jason and they are an instant family. I also think its funny when the girls who are late twenties early thirties are saying "I am so ready to settle down, and have kids eventually" Eventually? hello your biological clock is ticking. Yes, they are still young and have time to have kids, but women seriously take their fertility for granted and there comes a time where you need to get your life together. Here John and I are going to great lenghts to have our children, and these girls think the day you say "ok its time for a baby" that it will happen the next day. People forget that the average time to concieve a child is nine months. So it takes time, its not something that we have command to happen. I wish. So to all those girls who can't get enought of The Bachelor, and I am one of them, here's to Jason picking the right woman for himself and for Tyler!

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 26, 2009

"We promise according to our hopes and perform according to our fears."- Francois De La Rochefoucauld

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 25, 2009

"He who does not hope to win has already lost."- Jose' Joaquin Olmedo

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 24, 2009

"Faith moves mountains, but only knowledge moves them to the right place."- Joseph Goebbels

IUI's a new interesting study!

I found this article interesting because having been told that IVF with ICSI is out best option due to having boardeline sperm morohology issues. The age old question is where is the cut off line between doing IUI and doing IVF, most fertility specalists will say to do at least 3 IUI's before moving to IVF, while others say with certain criteria do not even try and IUI, do not pass go, do not collect $200, GO STRAIGHT TO IVF. This article takes men with a strict morphology of 5% and below and 5% and above and tests the pregnancy rate of both groups.

Normally multiplying the total motile sperm count by the percent of normal sperm determined by strict morphology (TM×SM) may be a significant predictor of pregnancy when sperm morphology is less than 5%, according to a new study by Texas researchers. It as been said that with a less then 5% morphology there is a harder time achieveing pregnancy.

It has been suggested that in vitro fertilization (IVF) with intracytoplasmic sperm injection (ICSI) may be the best treatment option for couples with less than 5% normal sperm strict morphology. Wanting to investigate whether the 5% threshold or the TM×SM was a significant predictor of intrauterine insemination (IUI) success, researchers looked at infertile couples undergoing IUI at their institution between November 1995 and December 2007. Their findings suggest that TM×SM may be helpful in selecting couples who are not suitable for IUI.

Females that were excluded from the study had an age greater than 40 years, history of endometriosis, tubal factor, or history of previous IVF or use of donor sperm. A total of 237 couples were included in the study. The investigators determined total motile sperm counts for each of the initial semen analyses and used the Kruger strict morphology criteria to calculate the percentage of total normal sperm, then multiplied to get the TM×SM.

The overall cumulative pregnancy rate was about 30%. Mean female age, mean strict morphology, mean TMC, and mean TM×SM in both the pregnant and nonpregnant groups were similar. The pregnancy rate was 24% in couples with strict morphology less than 5% (about 45% of the cohort) compared with a pregnancy rate of 34% in couples with strict morphology of 5% or more. The difference was not statistically significant.

In couples with SM less than 5%, the pregnant group had a significantly higher mean TM×SM compared with the nonpregnant group (3.7 million vs. 2.3 million). No pregnancies occurred in the 14 couples whose TM×SM was less than 0.29 million. Overall, TM×SM was the only significant predictor of pregnancy in couples with SM below 5%.

In laymans terms this study tells us not to look at strict morphology alone. You should also look at the total motile count and combine it with the strict morphology, said study investigator Ertug Kovanci, MD, assistant professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Baylor College of Medicine in Houston. “Sometimes IVF with ICSI is recommended just because the strict morphology is less than 5%. But we are saying that if the total motile count is good, you don't have to do IVF with ICSI [in these couples]. You can get away with IUIs.”

That is great news, because it could potentially lead to huge costs savings because IUI is both less invasive and less expensive. Obviously if continued IUI's are not successful then it is important to speak to your fertility specalist about moving forward to IVF with ICSI, but this study gives hope to those who have boarderline sperm morphology numbers. In our case, we were told go right to IVF with ICSI, but after some time and lots of vitamins John's sperm had improved and we now fit into the parameters to do IUI's and John has put up steller numbers at both of our IUI's. So things change, espiclly sperm. One thing to keep in mind with IUI's is the success rate is not as high as an IVF on one cycle, so it may take more then one cycle to achieve pregnancy, do not give up hope.
Best of luck to you!

Friday, January 23, 2009

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 23, 2009

"It's a lot better to hope than to."- Benjamin J. Stein

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 22, 2009

"Man needs, for his happiness, not only for enjoyment of this or that, but hope and enterprise and change."- Bertrand Russell

Celebrity infertility stories

I know something that helps me get through the bad days to to read stories about other couples have battled infertility and won. One of my favorite Hollywood glam girls, and everyone's favorite OCD "Friend" is Courtney Cox Arquette. She is very open and honest about her battle with infertility. David and Courtney Cox-Arquette have had a well publicized battle with infertility. After several
miscarriages due to immunity problems they sought help and decided to go through with IVF,and after years of heart ache they finally had a healthy, baby girl, Coco. In a Good Housekeeping article, Courtney was quoted, "In vitro is a wonderful thing that people can do in this day and age,and I'm lucky enough to be able to afford it." She and David hope to do IVF again to bring Coco a sibling, but have not ruled out adoption either.

Another great story is famous director Tim Burton and his wife, Helena Bonham Carter's story. After trying Clomid, IVF, and several alternative treatments without success they conceived a beauitful baby girl naturally, born December 2007.

Its amazing how many lives infertility strikes and that everyone finds ways to get through it. I will continue to tell other celebrities stories in the coming days.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Infertility affects everyone

When you are going through infertility you feel so alone and you feel as if you are the only one who is experiencing it. You may not know this but many hollywood stars have suffered through infertility and have won the battle. Here is a brief list of Hollywood stars who have dealt with infertility- I will spend the next few days telling their stories. I am sure you will be quite surprised to see the length of this list, and there are celebrities that have come out and actively speak about dealing with infertility.
- Courtney Cox Arquette
- Marcia Cross
- Brooke Shields
- Brenda Strong
- Cindy Margolis
- Jenna Jameson
- Angela Bassett
- Garcelle Beauvais-Nilon
- Christie Brinkley
- Helena Bonham Carter
- Nancy Grace
- Deidre Hall
- Emily and Martie of The Dixie Chicks

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 21, 2009

"Faith in the best and safest course."- Jean Paul Richter

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Inpirational Quote of Hope January 20, 2009

"Everything in woman hath a solution. It is called pregnancy."- Friedrich Nietzsche

Inauguration day 2009!

Today was the inauguration of our 44th president, Barack Obama. Now, while I did not vote for this man, I do support change. So hopefully we are in for some change, god knows our country could use it. Being is that we are trying so hard to have a child, I have to ensure that our child will have a great, successful, thriving, and safe nation to grow up in.

So here's to our new president, may he surround himself with great men and women to can help him lead out country out of the darkness into the light.
Today is not about Democrat and Republican, black or white, its about change and coming together as a country to celebrate our great nation and working to make it better! So here we go President Obama, get ready for the ride of your life!

Monday, January 19, 2009

The dreaded diagnosis: Unexplained

In the wonderful world of infertility there many different diagnosis's- we have been falling into the what I can the "dreaded" diagnosis of unexplained infertility. However there is some science behind the unexplained diagnosis.

Infertility is officially defined as the inability to conceive after one year of sexual intercourse without the use of any contraceptive methods. A systematic and standard evaluation of all couples with infertility usually involves three initial tests:

1. Confirmation of ovulation by History and lab tests.
2. An assessment of the fallopian tubes and the uterus by the use of an x-ray called Hysterosalpingogram (HSG).
3. An assessment of a semen analysis (SA).

If the results of these three tests are normal, and the couple has been trying to conceive for at least one year, the diagnosis of unexplained infertility is made. Of the patients seeking infertility treatment nearly 10 to 15 percent are diagnosed with unexplained infertility. What this means is that even though the initial tests we perform to evaluate ovulation, the fallopian tubes and SA are normal, this couple has difficulty conceiving due to some inefficiency in the process of conception.

Eventually most couples with unexplained infertility get pregnant. The problem may be an inefficiency that can be overcome with time and more attempts at conception. Most patients with unexplained infertility conceive within six to seven years. Perhaps a younger patient can afford the wait, but older patients may not have the luxury of time.

Now, I know that everyone is freaking out when I say six to seven years, now that seems like a really long time. I am 28 right now and my husband is 38 years old, so where I could afford to wait my husband cannot, its not that he couldn't physically have kids when he is older, but why would he want to be 44 when he could be 39? That is why I am so grateful that we have modern medical advances that can help speed up the procedure.

Unexplained Infertility may be a mystery since it assumes that in most cases we do not know what is the cause of infertility. In fact there is often something wrong at a more basic level. For example, it is possible that there is something wrong at the level of the gametes (egg & sperm) and their interaction with each other, or their interaction with the female reproductive organs.

It is also possible to have sperm that appear normal under a microscope,therefore causing the seman analysis to appear normal, however sometimes the sperm is not able to perform the function of fertilization adequately. Furthermore, one can have normal sperm but poor quality eggs that do not fertilize or fertilize at a lower than expected rate. If normal eggs and sperm meet, one can expect a fertilization rate between 60 to 90 percent. The outer shell of the egg, the Zona Pellucida, usually hardens after one sperm enters the egg. It is possible for the outer shell not to allow a sperm to enter, or allow too many sperm to enter the egg. Both these situations result in abnormalities that lead to infertility. There is where ICSI in conjuction with IVF is a miracle, because a single sperm is injected into a single egg causing a much hight fertilization rate.

Once an egg is fertilized, there is an 80 percent chance of cell division. The rate of division of the resulting embryo is also of significance. Usually 48 hours after fertilization, the embryo is between two to four cells (blastomeres). At 72 hours, they are usually between six to eight cells. After five days of growth, they are usually over 120 cells with a fluid cavity in the middle (Blastocyst). If a larger than expected percentage of embryos divide slowly or stop dividing at any stage, this can result in infertility. This is where IVF is helpful because the embroyos that have the correct number of cells are the ones that are transferred back into the uterus, therefore causing a higher probability that one will implant and cause a healthy pregnancy.

There can also be problems with normal attachment or implantation of the embryo once it reaches the uterine cavity. This can be due to the presence or absence of certain important factors needed for implantation at the level of the uterus or the embryo. The outer shell of the embryo can be too hard or thick and not allow hatching of the embryo out of its shell (Zona Pellucida). This can result in a lower chance of implantation. A genetic abnormality with the embryo can lead to infertility. The embryos suspected of having a higher chance of a genetic abnormality are embryos with a higher degree of cell fragmentation (abnormal looking cells in the embryo).

Although, an evaluation of the fallopian tubes, ovulation, and a SA are good initial screening tests, they do not identify all causes of infertility. Unexplained infertility therefore is not one specific diagnosis, but possibly a combination of one or many inefficiencies in the processes of conception.

If you are suffering from unexplained infertility, just remember that some things just take time, and eventually most couples suffering from unexplained infertility will go onto conceive. But remember that with all the medical interventions we can take the guesswork out of a lot of possible issues that you may be having, therefore giving you the best chance of getting and staying pregnant.

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 19, 2009

"Hope is necessary in every condition. The miseries of poverty, sickness, and captivity would, without this comfort, be insupportable."- Samuel Johnnson

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 18, 2008

"Courage is like love; it must have hope for nourishment."- Napoleon I

200TH post! Sex Scheduling.

I can't believe we have hit 200 posts! How excited, so in the spirit I though I would spice it up a bit and talk about our favorite subject, SEX!

Now, as most of us know the frequency of sex drops after marriage, my husband always says that wedding cake is the anti sex drug! But its true, I think about how different our lives were when we were dating compared to our lives married. Now we have a house, a business, jobs, and other commitments. I have less time then when we were dating. I think its also a matter of taking each other for granted, I know he will be there tomorrow night, so whats the harm in pushing it off a night? Its bad and I am not proud, but sex does take a back seat to all the other commitments that come with marriage.

Now, throw dealing with infertility into the mix and talk about having no sex life!
Trying to have a baby without having any problems definitely leads to sex on a schedule, however when you have the added stress of infertility sex is even more on a schedule and when you get to a certain point in the infertility treatment you don't even have to have sex to get pregnant, it all happens in a doctors office with the help of a lab.

A lot of the fertility drugs cause a decrease in your sex drive, so taking the drugs that are necessary to get pregnant causes your sex drive to be almost non existent.

A study conducted at Duke University Medical Center, and presented at ASRM by Dr. Jennifer Norten, examined “sexual satisfaction and functioning in patients seeking infertility treatment.” Dr. Norten proved what many suspected, and in doing so validated our feelings. “The results of this study suggest that women undergoing infertility treatment experience significant changes in various aspects of sexual desire, arousal, orgasm, length of foreplay and frequency of intercourse.”

How can you feel sexually attractive when your body is full of hormones and bruised or sore from injections? You have to keep the lines of communication open. Talk to your partner, try and laugh about it, and when you feel up to it, try and make sex romantic.

John and I talk about and laugh about how we never have sex and when we do get pregnant John may not even be in the room. We know this is not how things are always going to be, but right now this is our reality, we want a baby more then anything and are willing to do whatever it takes to get it.

Now if you feel that sexuality or lack thereof is seriously jeopardizing your marriage, I urge you to seek seek help and support. Individual counseling and/or support groups help you realize you are not alone. Sometimes it’s nice to hear someone else sharing the same problems. That alone may be enough to get you through this trying time.

Remember this is temporary and we can do anything as long as it is temporary.

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 17, 2008

"All kids need a little help, a little hope and somebody who believes in them."- Earvin Johnson

Friday, January 16, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 16, 2009

"A ship ought not to be held by one anchor, nor life by a single hope."- Epictetus

What the hell is a DIVA CUP?

That was my first question when I kept seeing this coming up over and over on a message board that I frequent on, so I started to do some research and this is what I found.

The DivaCup is a non-absorbent menstrual cup that simply collects menstrual flow. It is inserted in the vagina and sits at the lower base of the vaginal canal. It is worn internally, yet because it is soft and smooth, it cannot be felt nor will it leak when inserted properly. So pretty much its a dixie cup that you wear in your va jay jay! I have to admit I was shocked and I cannot image trying to insert this contraption. Also I do not believe that it doesn't leak! I mean come on. But anyways I kept researching, the DivaCup claims to be the most clean and convenient method of feminine hygiene protection. No need to touch the flow. It is worn low in the vagina, not near the cervix, so it is easy to remove. No mess!- I guess they consider tampons messy, I mean isn't that what the string is for?

The DivaCup can be worn for up to 12 hours before emptying, washing and reinserting for use for another 12 hours. It can be used for light or moderate flows and is emptied more often to accommodate heavy flows. Perfect for overnight use. So pretty much if you have heavy flow you may need to empty it more frequently.

The Diva Cup can be purchased online through, that was the only pleace tat I found it. There is a website where you can search for a store that carries it in your state.

I have to admit I am intrigued by this product, think how much money we could save if we didn't have to buy tampons or pads? But the thought of having to clean something out kinda makes me sick. I am still contemplating buying on, maybe I will just to do a review of it on my blog.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 15, 2009

"Hope is a waking dream."- Aristotle (384-322 B.C.)


Well, my lap was yesterday, and I had to admit that it was super easy, much easier then expected. I was in pain right after surgery, but after some pain killers I was good, when I left the hospital I had no pain. John and I got breakfast and went home, I went right onto the couch and rested all day. I had on and off shoulder pain (which is expected) as well as some pain around my inscision site (inside my belly button) but I took my pain killers every four hours and had a great nights sleep.

Today I was up when John went to work, I again rested on the couch for the majority of the day, I did venture out to Target and to the dry cleaners. I am having a little more shoulder pain today, and some stomach pains, but I am not taking my pain medicine as much, so it could just be that I am taking less medicine therefor feeling more pain.

Our doctor found no endo, but she did make sure my fallopian tubes are open and clear, so that is good, its been awhile since I had my HSG (which is where the shoot dye into your uterus in hopes that it comes out your fallopian tubes) so at least I know everything is cleaned out down there. I am happy that I don't have any endo, endo can be really painful as well as cause a lot of fertility issues. Like I need one more thing to worry about.

So all is well, I am still taking another three days off to rest and recover, tomorrow I am going to venture out for a few more errands and meetings, but I will still take lots of time to rest.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 14, 2009

"Expect to have hope rekindled. Expect your prayers to be answered in wondrous ways. The dry seasons in life do not last. The spring rains will come again."- Sarah Ban Breathnach

And the Survey Says...

Well, Shannon went through her surgery with flying colors. The laparoscopy took about an hour start to finish.

Our doctor found...nothing. Everything is fine, no toxic environment. Perfect for having a baby. Which leaves us as unexplained.

Shannon is doing great and looks the same as she did when we arrived at the hospital. She has a little discomfort, but other than that everything is great and she resting.

The doctor wants to see her in two weeks and we will probably try another IUI cycle. We are planning to IVF in April. So keep your fingers crossed our insurance kicks in to cover that.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 13, 2009

"In all pleasure hope is a considerable part."- Samuel Johnson

Mixed Emotions

results, Tomorrow is Shannon's laparoscopic surgery. Seems to be a fairly simple procedure and the people I know who have had it say it isn't that bad. No matter how simple it really is it's still surgery.

Any time you have to be put unconscious for something worries me somewhat. So, I do have some concerns about the whole thing as well as looking forward to it in some ways.

Again using anesthesia can be dangerous and couldn't bear for anything bad to happen to Shannon. Also, the people I have talk to say there is some discomfort afterwards so I feel bad for her. My sweetie is a trooper and I thank her for all she has had to go through.

I also don't know how to take the results. On one hand there may be nothing wrong at all. No Endometriosis, no cysts, no nothing. Which could be a could thing and we'll know that there is non-toxic environment in there.

On the other hand I want to know something is wrong so that at least we can fix it and move on. Right now we perfectly fine and simply experiencing unexplained infertility. Maybe if we find something wrong that we can't it can be corrected and it will be smooth sailing from there.

For those of you who read our posts please pray for us. For Shannon's safety as well as us having a baby one day. Thank you!

Monday, January 12, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 12, 2009

"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all."- Dale Carnegie

An afternoon at the fertility clinic

Today I had my pre op appt at my fertility specialists office. I love her and her staff, so when I go there its almost like cocktail hour. We have to catch up on the latest news since my last appt. My favorite nurse today to me that she cannot wait until she doesn't have to see me anymore, in a good way, she said she just likes to see the babies. Shes super sweet and her and my doctor are so genuine I truly believe that want to get me pregnant just as much as I want it.

I had called her on Friday to see if she had the name of someone I could talk to, I think I need so therapy. My doctor was out of town last week, but first thing this morning I had an email from my doctor telling me to keep my chin up and we will get this. Today when I went in the nurse had a name and number for me of someone who specializes in fertility cases. Its the little things that make me feel like they really care.

But while I was sitting in the waiting room I was watching everyone come in and out, and its amazing to see all the different faces of infertility. There was a beautiful tall brunettes girl that was so cute, designer jeans, high heels and her Louis Vuitton bag slug over her shoulder. I began to think that infertility knows no boundaries, it can effect everyone at anytime.

I started chatting with an older lady who told me that she was doing IVF, she is single and is ready for a baby, screw finding mr. right. I give her a lot credit, and wish her the best of luck. However, she starts asking me all these questions, and I am thinking "shouldn't she know this?" here she is in the beginning of her IVF cycle and she doesn't even know what kind of medicine she is taking. Then I started chatting with another lady, who in my opinion looked like a character in Harry Potter (and no not Hermione) but again infertility knows no class, ethnicity, or race.

After my appt I had to go register at the hospital for my surgery on Wednesday and of course in front of me there is a lady who is pre registering for labor and delivery (what are the freaking chances!) I couldn't have been after the old man registering for prostate surgery?!
But anyway I overheard her talking with the admitting clerk (by the way its so not confidential) and shes telling her that she is on Medicaid and Welfare, she is 24 and unemployed and has no clue who the baby's father is. So that was wonderful! Oh well, maybe with a baby she will get her life together! But in the meantime I am paying for her hospital stay, with my tax dollars.

Well, keep us in your prayers as I prepare for my lap on Wednesday, heres to hoping she finds something and fixes it!

Sunday, January 11, 2009

I Feel This Guys Pain

Hi, Folks. John here. Although, this is not me in this video, I feel like him on an almost daily basis. My semen analysis has been great and my boys are swimming like champs. Shannon seems fine too and she has her lap on Wednesday so maybe we will learn more. If the doctor finds anything I hope it will be an easy fix. Shannon has a friend that got pregnant after her lap so I hope we have the same results.

For those of you going through infertility you know what this gentleman feels like. For those who don't, I feel this video shows the emotions of those going through infertility issues like us.

My kudos to this gentleman for posting his video and sharing his story.

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 11, 2009

"True hope dwells on the impossible, even when life seems to be a plot written by someone who wants to see how much adversity we can overcome. True hope responds to the real world; to real life; it is an active effort."- Walter Anderson

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 10, 2009

"With every rising of the sun, Think of your life as just begun. The past is shrived and buried deep all yesterdays; there let them sleep. Concern yourself with but today, Woo it, and to teach it to obey your will and wish. Since time began today has been the friend of man; but in this blindness and his sorrow, he looks to yesterday and tomorrow. You, and today!a soul sublime, and the great pregnant hour of time, with God himself to bind the twain! Go forth, I say attain, attain! With God himself to bind the twain."- Ella Wilcox

Friday, January 9, 2009

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 9, 2009

"Life is always a rich and steady time when you are waiting for something to happen or to hatch."- E. B. White

A new kind of low

Today has been a horrible day, I have tired to stay busy at work, but it is difficult, my mind keeps wondering as it often does. I have a lump that has been in my throat all day, its like I could cry at the drop of a hat, damn PMS hormones. I wish I knew what were raw emotions and what were hormones, then maybe I would feel better.

I realized today that I have reached an all time low in my life. This is the lowest point in my short 28 year life. I feel like I have nothing left, I feel this emptiness that I never knew was possible to feel. I do not want to feel this way, I hate it I want to be happy and enjoy my life, but without a baby it seems impossible. I want so badly to be the family at the park on the swings, and the family at Disneyland (our favorite place) we have so much love and so much to give to a child, why are we not being allowed that opportunity?

The past month has been hard, we have been on a break, waiting for my lap surgery to get scheduled, now looking back I wish I had gone for it and had it on New Years Eve, at least I would know the results and we would be looking forward to our next cycle. My surgery is scheduled for next Wednesday so at least I will have some answers after that.

I feel as if this has become an addiction, because as long as we are doing something and being proactive I feel better, I feel like we are working towards our goal, instead of sitting here waiting with our thumbs up our ass. I was okay at the beginning of the break, but now towards the end I am getting antsy. I feel like a little kid with a countdown to summer vacation.

I have never been a procrastinator- so I am all about get in and get it done and move on, oh how ready I am so ready to move on with my life and start my new role as mother. To me being a parent is the most natural thing, so why this is so hard for us I will never know.

Its so strange because I never wanted kids, I never saw my life with kids, and now I cannot see it without kids. Maybe it was because I was always with the wrong person, John is such a natural with kids and they love him. Maybe it was just that I didn't want kids with anyone but John. I am not sure, maybe I just grew up, I guess it's a good thing that 16 year old's don't want kids, considering that they are still kids themselves.

Being childless is my greatest fear, I even hate the word. I do not even like to look at it or type it, the very thought of that makes me physically sick. We have to do everything medically and humanly possible to have children.

I just need to muster up the strength to fight this battle that is my life. I need to do something, I need to get strong and stop being such a crying pain in the ass. I really need someone to kick me into reality so I can stop being pity party, party of one.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

A broken heart

Well, no break cycle Christmas miracle for us, tonight my wonderful monthly friend came to visit! Oh, how I wish she would take a hike for nine months.

John and I had our typical responses, we cried then yelled, it seems to be our monthly regime. This sucks! That is all I can really say at this point. Yes, I still cry, but really I am mad. I don't understand why this is happening to us. The amount of anger I have inside of me cannot be healthy for any human to be carrying around.

The other day I was thinking about why this bothers me so much, and I am going to try to explain this without sounding like too much of a snob, and if it comes across snobbish I apologize up front. But growing up, I got whatever I wanted, I had a great life, great friends, a loving family, and a comfortable upbringing.
My friends were always jealous of me, not the other way around. Not that my friends didn't have a good life, they did. I grew up in an upper middle class small town, we all had good lives. But out of my friends I was the only one who had a pool at my house, got a brand new car when I turned 16 and another new one when I turned 18, I had a horse, and the membership to the country club where we would hang out all summer long. I had a great life, and things were easy for me. So when you have everything that you need what do you have to be jealous of? I had nothing to be jealous of.

Now that I am an adult things have changed. Now do not get me wrong John and I have a good life, we have a beautiful home, good jobs, great family and friends, but we do not have a baby, we are losing the baby race.

We are the only people out of our close friends who doesn't have a baby (out of those who want kids) and it stinks! We have to sit through holidays and birthday parties with everyone elses kids, with none of our own. It absolutely sucks! So now I have something to be jealous of, now I know you never want someone else's life, because you don't know truly what their life is like, however its hard to think about that then you see them with their children.

I have grown a lot in realizing that things do not make you happy, all the stuff that I had growing up doesn't make you happy, its just stuff. So I do not want anymore stuff, what I want is the love of a child, our child.

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 8, 2009

"There is no friendship, no love, like that of a mother for her child."- Henry Ward Beecher

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 7, 2009

"Feeling fat lasts for nine months but the joy of becoming a mom lasts forever."- Nikki Dalton

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 6, 2009

"Whether your pregnancy was meticulously planned, medically coaxed, or happened by surprise, one thing is for certain--your life will never be the same."- Catherine Jones

Monday, January 5, 2009

When should acupuncture treatment begin?

Acupuncture is similar to physical therapy in that it is a process oriented method of medical intervention. It is better to do more than less and on a consistent basis. Patients are commonly treated for three to four months before an insemination (IUI), in vitro fertilization (IVF), or donor-egg transfer. This period of treatment seems to have a therapeutic effect.

In a study by Stener-Victorin et al from the Departments of Obstetrics and Gynecology Fertility Centre, Scandinavia and University of Gothenburg, women are encouraged to receive acupuncture treatments pre and post embryo transfer and pre and post insemination. Clinical observations from the Berkley Center for Reproductive Wellness suggest that the most effective fertility treatments involve a combination of acupuncture, herbal medicine, and traditional medical interventions. However, conception does sometimes occur when acupuncture and herbal medicines are used without traditional medical interventions.

My suggestion would be to talk to your acupuncturist and talk about your treatments and find out what works best for your schedule. Of course the more consistent treatment the bettter results you will have but do what work best for you.

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 5, 2009

"A baby is something you carry inside you for nine months, in your arms for three years and in your heart till the day you die."- Mary Mason

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Infertility and Acupuncture

This is going to start my series on acupuncture, we will address the use of acupuncture in conjunction with infertility treatments.

Acupuncture is defined as the insertion of ultra-thin, sterile needles into specific points on the body which reside on channels or meridians; these are pathways in both the exterior and interior of the body. These points, when needled, can regulate the way in which the body functions. Acupuncture helps by addressing problems that affect fertility such as under-functioning (hypothyroidism) or over-functioning (hyperthyroidism).

Acupuncture, frequently combined with herbal medicine, has been used for centuries to treat some causes of infertility. An individual could from acupuncture and herbs because of the potential effect of improved ovarian and follicular function. Additionally, it is shown that acupuncture can increase blood flow to the endometrium, helping to facilitate a thick, rich lining.

I have been going to acupuncture for a little over a year, and I love it, not only is it very relaxing, but it has helped to regulate my cycle. The best times to go are before ovulation and after ovulation, acupuncturists like to see you around 7 days after ovulation because that is when implantation is occurring if you have become pregnant that cycle.

I would defiantly suggest acupuncture for anyone going through fertility treatments, its a great time for you to relax and it can be very beneficial.

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 4, 2009

"The very least you can do in life is to figure out what you hope for. And the most you can do is live inside that hope. Not admire it from a distance but live right in it, under its roof."- Barbara Kinglover, US Novelist

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Infertility Myth #1

“Having a baby is the most important thing in my life. If I can’t have one, I don’t know what I will do.”

Becoming a parent is an important goal, and for some the goal of becoming a parent may never be “number one" and for others it can become all consuming.
Dealing with infertility and fertility treatments can be difficult, its a lot of time and money spent. Getting pregnant becomes the most important thing in life.

I have said to before, but it is so important to take time for yourself and your partner. Not everything has to be about having a baby. Remember to take time to do things that are not baby related, take a weekend getaway, go to a day spa, or just take a walk in the park.

You will feel better and feel like you can face your fertility treatments with a healthy relaxed mind set.

Try and remind your friends and family, if they know about your infertility, that you do have a life outside of baby making. These people may feel like they need to ask you about everything every time you talk to them, it can get exhausting. You deserve the right to have a fun night out without having to worry about talking about your fertility.

Just rememebr you put yourself first!

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 3, 2009

"Fear is faith that it won't work out." Unknown

Friends Having Babies...There is Hope for us Yet.

Our good friends had their second child yesterday. They have had their share of infertility issues, but never really pursued any medical treatment. And haven't endured any of the drugs, shots, blood taking or doctor appointments. But it has taken them 8 years to have 2 children.

John and I have been friends since elementary school and grew up in the same neighborhood. Sometimes, I wonder if there is something in the water here in Las Vegas or it's just this town causing infertility. I know the facts about infertility, but sometimes you wonder is their something going on? Just like cancer. I know so many people going through that it's like what's up?

My Friend John is the same age as me, but he started trying having kids a lot sooner. Although, they had trying times like us he had a little more time.

I guess I worry that I will be too old to play with our kids or won't see them graduate or get married or have children of their own. But that doesn't mean we quit trying or give up hope.

We have had more than one friend recently get pregnant, who have been having infertility issues too, which gives such a great sense of hope. I believe if someone else can do it so can we. Our turn is next.

Inspirational Quote Of Hope January 2, 2009

"Faith doesn't mean you don't have doubts."- Barack Obama

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Infertility Myth #2

“We would consider adoption, but it is so expensive and it takes such a long time to get a baby.”

While some adoption programs can be expensive, U.S. citizens can take advantage of the Adoption Tax Credit which became available on January 1, 2002 and is a credit of up to $10,390, actually now in 2009 it is a little over $11,000. Most families qualify for this credit which helps make adoption very affordable. Some agencies, such as Bethany Christian Services, offer low-cost loans or other financial aid for adoptive families, also Catholic Charities offers very affordable adoption, they are located in most states. While it is true that some families wait for a period of time before receiving a baby, there are many adoptable children waiting for a home right now. Should you decide to adopt, do not assume that you will have a long wait, the average wait time with Catholic Charities is 9-12 months. So there is a lot of incorrect informaiton about adoption out there that causes couples to shy away from it.

Get informed, a greaet book, is Adoption for dummies, it offers a lot of good informaation and is a easy read, its a great start!

Inspirational Quote of Hope January 1, 2009

"In the night of death, hope sees a star; and then, if we are true to plan, our statures touch the sky."- Robert Ingersoll

Hello 2009! Happy New Year Everyone!

Shannon began taking down the Christmas decorations this morning. I always feel sad when that process begins. I love Christmas and we had a great one last year as we do every year.

I was going to post all of our blessings for last year, but Shannon beat me to it. Our focus on having a baby I think let us forget what a wonderful year it really was and I know in my heart 2009 is going to be even better.

I am looking forward to what 2009 has to bring to us and I wish everyone a Happy New Year!