Friday, December 12, 2008

Is this life?

Tonight John and I spent a comfy relaxing evening on the couch with a pizza and a funny movie. It was really nice. I had almost forgot what its like to have a life, we didn't talk about babies, fertility, treatments, or doctors. It was nice. I have felt really good the past few days, in a way I am happy to be on a break, but on the other hand I am counting the days until my next appt with Dr. L to discuss when my lap will be and what can we do about some of my issues that I have noticed with these last 2 IUI's.
Living in Las Vegas you think I would be hooked to gambling, but that could not be farther from the truth. Yes, I watch movies like 21, and wish I could do that and makes tons of money, but in the end I would much rather go shopping, at least I know I will leave with something. But I think fertility treatments have become my addiction. I feel like I am always doing something that revolves around us having a baby. I know its good to fight for what you want, but I think I need this break. I feel like every moment of every day is consumed with worry of not being able to have a baby and what can we do next and what can I do to my body now? So I need this time to think about other things like Christmas shopping, making Christmas dinner, or hanging out with friends and family. I am so busy at work that is also keeping me super busy during the days. I will be happy to get back to baby making, but I am going to try to keep everything in perspective.

1 comment:

TTC a lil F said...

I can totally relate. I can't remember what life was like, when we didn't care that we didn't have kiddos.